Friendship over the years

 

Circa San Francisco 2015

I think we are all familiar with the saying, "Collect and select." I have associated this line with dating and courtship. It is believed that a man or a woman would go out on a date with multiple individuals to be able to choose the best one at the end. Some may have different opinions about it and I'm just gonna leave it like that because what I'm trying to point out is that, this mentality also applies with our friendships.

I consider myself a very social person. I love to hang-out. I enjoy entertaining. I like to be surrounded with others.  I love to hear their stories and I also like to share my story. So over the years, I have met a lot of people from my childhood, high school, college, all my extra-curricular activities, abroad and in the present time. They represented all walks of life. They have somehow taught me a thing or two. Some of them I'm still friends with and some they were just a passerby. But among the many, which friends would probably stay for the years to come?

That is why, I came across with the idea of collect and select and as to how it has affected our friendship over time. The friendship we've built early on our lives might possibly not last. But it doesn't mean that those people were not important. In fact, they were once part of our lives and either one of you became that shoulder to cry on for that person and that will be a memory to cherish.

As human beings, our lives tend to drift apart and drifting apart is always a hard idea to accept but it's part of our reality. It could be a change of career path, moving out of state or just the average change of point of view. Then from there, we have the tendency to shed friends. It's a natural thing because we are going through the phenomenon of maturity and growth. The things we like together, our opinions, our lifestyle and our priorities would begin to differ. It's not that we dislike each other, we pretty much just move on. So just be ready to make new ones. It's scary I know. But we need to make that one step.

I read this from an article and it made me think hard because this is how I feel when it comes to my friends. 

"I cling to friends because they are like mementos, photographs, and diaries. Since I don't live with a built-in camcorder, an infinite supply of audiotape, my friends fill in the gaps and form a composite. Their recollections boil down to reality; their commentary boils down to perspective. I build on their remembrances to figure out who I am, where I was and when it really happened. Friends are my antidote to fading memory." -Bonnie Mcgrath

Such a beautiful reminder. Truth to be told, as I got older, I only share my most deepest intimacy, darkest secret and my crazy escapades to a few. I'm sure you have those selected ones who maintains that special place in your heart. However, for all those friendships we've built in our lifetime, somehow they have played a significant role in our lives whether we admit or not. They helped us become who we are now because “A friend is a person you decide you like, and then you choose to do stuff with them.” 

And truly, I am grateful for those who've stuck around. Who needs a lot when you only need a few good ones.